LIFE BIKE THREE

RED HOT OUTRAGE!  FLAMING HATRED!  DEATH THOUGHTS to those park police.  I am stunned.  I am a thin and beautiful person in my mind. Those park police laughed at me falling off my bike.  I had blood running down my leg.  They laughed. Maybe they laughed at the thought I couldn’t get out of the park on the long side.  Maybe they laughed because a curvy woman fell off her bike.  Good GAD!

I probably peddled home at nearly 50 mph in my rage.  I thought about how I could pedal up the other side of the park road.  By now I had been devouring bike magazine ads.  I have found all the gadgets.  I have even bought some of them at the lucky bike store.  Why is the bike store lucky, you ask?  Because my addiction means I visit the store and spend money!

I have discovered the answer on my rage filled home ride.  I stomp into the house and corner my poor unsuspecting spouse.  I yell the story of the laughing park police at him.  I tell him that I need these special pedals and special shoes.  The bike accessory inventors came up with special shoes that attach themselves to special pedals.  Normal pedals are powered by the down push of one’s legs.  If your foot is attached to the pedal, you get 50% more power.  You have pulling force when you bring your leg up to make those bike wheels move.  “That’s what I need!” I yelled.  There was no argument in my husband.  He didn’t care if I attached my feet to the pedal or not.  He tried to show sympathy about me forgetting to apply to brakes when I stopped.  I can imagine thrill he was experiencing picturing his “crazy wife” story to his guy co-workers.  Oh I know he couldn’t wait to go to work the next day.

They know my name at the bike store now.  I appeared and told the owner of my rage and what I needed.  We picked out my special shoes.  He kept my bike to install the special pedals.  “Vengeance would be mine!”

I picked up my vengeance yellow bike the next day.  We came home and practiced.  I learned there is a bit of an art to being attached to one’s pedals.

  1. Twist the foot to the side to get loose
  2. Twist the foot to the side before you dismount from the bike
  3. It is possible to free both feet at the same time
  4. Bike riders always put the same foot down on the ground when first dismounting.  Make certain that is the foot that is twisted loose from the pedal

Like I said, there are a few rules to follow when riding with attached pedals.  No problem.  I mastered all of them and no blood was spilled.  I was ready for action!