The Rosy Cheek Road to Ava
This is the first year for the #1 World Grand Champion Boyfriend, the next essential is make-up. I haven’t been anywhere dressy since “you know what” started. I grabbed the make-up essentials out of the drawer and nestled them snugly into the essential underwear, and went in search of my summer, fall, and winter clothing. I held my hands up to reach for a shirt and noticed that I was bleeding. It looked like Jack the Ripper had sawed my hands with a dull blade. What! Oh, it’s not blood. What? It’s creamy. I washed my hands three times to get the fake blood from my hands, under my fingernails and embedded into the wrinkles that I don’t have. I must have touched something wrong in the drawer, but I’ll check that out when I get back from Ava.
The essentials looked good, and I overstuff four weeks of clothing into the suitcase and slammed it shut.
It’s time to head to Ava, never figuring out that the lid on the lipstick had come off in the midst of my underwear.
I can drive from my home to Ave, Missouri, with my eyes closed. I can drive to Ava and let my “go home” instincts take over. I’ve been to the Missouri Fox Trotter headquarters every year since 2007 and two years in 1997 & 1998. I have four hours to get 200 miles in time for the free member dinner. Us seniors need free food, along with all my friends and #1 Boyfriends accumulated over the many years.
A hitch into dementia occurred. In Springfield, I was supposed to get on I-44 east, head south on 65, and east on 60. Nope, not me. I was thinking of horse things and forgot about highway 65 south. I sailed on on I-44, going northeast. After 30-40 minutes, I became puzzled at not recognizing my landmarks. Where am I? I called on Siri, and Map Locator took over. Siri screamed at me, “Up there, dementia brain, turn on that narrow, curvy paved road and head east to 5 highway.”
I was pleased with the 5 highway directions. It is the road that leads straight south to Fox Trotter Heaven every Labor Day. Good Golly, there are a million curves, and I don’t recognize any landmarks. It’s beautiful out here in dementia country. Where am I? If I thought I might get to Ava before the show starts tomorrow, I would be thrilled. It’s a little tough to take these corners at 70mph. Thankfully, I met the policeman in Hartville while obeying the 35mph limit. Whew!
Siri sez only 45 more miles to go. Oh lordy, forty-five minutes is another hour. I keep slogging through the curves, and near the time that all the other people will be eating most of the food, Siri says Mansfield is only ten more curvy miles. I finally know where I am. I have driven many, many miles too far east. I break the speed limit from Mansfield and most other straight portions of the curvy road and triumphantly roar into the Fox Trotter Grounds while some people are still eating and listening to a band. Whew. I get my food and find my tribe. I load the crucial things first into the small suitcase. I never want to be without the essentials, even though there is a Walmart in Ava.
If you are in Ava this week, you can use my new code name, ‘Rosy Cheeks.’ If you are not in Ava, there is no code name, and you never read this story!